You might be a Rural Volunteer Fire Department if...

1. Your two way radio transmissions all begin with "Breaker, Breaker".

2. You have ever been dispatched to a working "cow" fire.

3. You ever put out a cow chip fire.

4. Your PASS alarms goes "Yeeee Haw".

5. Your dispatch center ever said "Y'all can't miss it".

6. You used your rescue air bags as furniture at the fire station.

7. You refill your air bottles at the local gas station "Free Air hose".

8. Your department has a Rescue Bubba and a Rescue Cow for training.

9. You only wash down the floor in the station to "keep the dust down".

10. Your radio call signal is "wheee doggies".

11. You have to mark the department "out of service" two weeks during deer
      season and every Sunday during the Winston Cup Race.

12. You consider "2 In and 2 Out" to be two guys in the cab and two on the
      tailboard of the truck.

13. You count reading fire magazines in the bathroom as training hours.

14. Your last four Fire Department raffles were for a shotgun.....and a member won
      it each time.

15. You borrowed the department's quick dump tank so you could have a
      neighborhood pool party.

16. Your safety officer is the person who broke his arm at the last house fire.

17. Your rehab consists of a cold beer and a bag of "Hot Fries".

18. Your last serious fire was your fire department BBQ.

19. You used your "good" fire hose as a bumper on your boat dock.

20. You have a shotgun rack in the back of your fire truck.........and got two bucks
      on your last call.

21. Your Hurst tool is on loan to the local body shop.

22. You use a hanging noose knot for all your rescue operations because its real
      adjustable.

23. You don't allow a person to join the department unless they own a pickup.

24. You wore a hole in your fire boots....... while wearing them at your full-time job.

25. You keep 2 packs of' "Red Man" in your turnout gear for emergencies.

26. Your department s brush truck doubles as your hunting truck.

27. You voted against the last person for chief because he was an Earnhardt fan.

28. You painted your new rescue truck to look like Bill Elliott's race car.

29. You borrowed the fire truck to use the spotlights for deer hunting.

30. The directions to your last house fire was "Go down past the last house you
      burnt up".......and you know exactly which house they are talking about.

31. You ever went diving in a swimming pool with your scba equipment......just to
      see how it would work.

32. You must take the battery out of your tractor to put in the fire truck before
      you go on calls.

33. Your preacher borrows your PASS alarms each Sunday for church to keep the
      congregation awake!

34. The last girl you kissed was named Resci-Annie and you enjoyed it so much
      you are thinking seriously about asking her out.
 

If you have any additions for this list, please e-mail me.